A Delivery Driver Starts Yelling at You. What Should You Do? 

New York City is a place where millions of people live in close proximity to one another. With so many people, situations can sometimes arise that may threaten your safety. Here are three real-life incidents that actually happened to VNS Health team members.

With that in mind, VNS Health has a team member whose job it is to help keep us all safe. Her name is Lauren Campbell, and she’s our Emergency Management and Employee Safety Director.

For the past eight-plus years, Lauren has been working with teams across the organization to implement and maintain safety policies and procedures that are designed to keep both team members who work in the field and those who work in our offices as safe as possible.

The following three incidents really happened to VNS Health team members. See how each team member responded. Then read Lauren’s recommended response to see how best to respond if you should ever find yourself in a similar situation.

“The delivery driver started yelling at me and threatened to wait until I came back out of the building.”

“I was about to enter an apartment building where my patient lived when I got into a verbal disagreement with a delivery driver who was also outside the building. The driver threatened me and said he would remain on the street until I came back out. I called 911. When police didn’t show up by the time I had seen my patient, I came back out of the building. By then, the delivery driver had left.”

Lauren’s advice:

There are a few things to note here. First, whenever you’re out in the community and someone gets into a heated disagreement with you, your first goal should always be to try and de-escalate the situation. Some techniques on how to do that include…

• Control your own reaction first (you can’t calm someone if you’re heated too)
• Don’t match their intensity (if they’re loud, you go quieter)
• Relax your posture (don’t point or move closer so they feel threatened)
• Acknowledge, but you don’t have agree (you don’t have to admit they’re right—but show you hear them)
• Give them space and don’t interrupt
• Set calm boundaries, if needed (“I want to talk this through, but not if you’re yelling)
• Know when to disengage.

And remember, if you should feel threatened, call 911. In this situation, the delivery driver left by the time the clinician had come out of the building—but if the person hadn’t left, I would have advised the clinician to remain inside the building until the police arrived. Finally, if you experience a threatening encounter like this, be sure to document it with your phone camera or write down the specific details—including, in this case, the name of the driver’s company, a description of the driver, the license plate number, and the reason for the argument—then share this information with the police.

“I was surrounded by a group of teenagers who asked what was in my wallet.”

“I was recently surrounded by a group of teenagers who got in my personal space. One of them asked to see my wallet. As I pulled it out to show them, they grabbed my wallet and ran off. I decided not to chase the group, but I did file a police report.”

Lauren’s advice:

This team member was right not to chase them. The team member also did the right thing to file a police report about the incident. Being the subject of a robbery is always scary—but if you are held up, do whatever is needed to de-escalate the situation. You can minimize any losses by keeping your money and credit cards separate from your purse or wallet, and by carrying only as much cash as you need that day for work. In general, always be mindful of your surroundings whenever you’re out in public and only remove valuables like a wallet or watch when you’re in a private, safe space.

“While riding the subway, a homeless man confronted me.”

“While I was riding the subway and reading a book, a homeless man appeared in front of me. I asked him to leave me alone, but the man began trying to remove his pants. I immediately got up and started walking to the next subway car. But as I was moving from one car to the other, my foot got caught between the two cars. I screamed for help, and passengers in the next car pressed the emergency button. Police and emergency responders arrived on the scene and helped free my foot, then took me to the hospital for X-rays and medical treatment. I was discharged home later that day, but I was really shaken by the incident.”

Lauren’s advice:

This situation could have been even more serious than it turned out to be. Fortunately, this team member did everything possible to avoid a potential attack. Although she was reading, she remained aware of her surroundings, which is always extremely important. She also followed another key rule: If you see someone who looks threatening, you should get up immediately and discreetly move. In this case, the team member removed herself from the situation and did everything she could to get away and look for help. It’s true that walking between subway cars is risky. Where possible, and if the situation does not appear to be life-threatening, you should try to wait until the next stop and then use the platform to change cars. In this case, however, the team member’s life was in danger, so walking between cars was her best option. When she did get her foot stuck, she again did the right thing: She screamed for help and got the assistance she needed. 

Do you have a safety-related question for Lauren? Click here to submit your question.